When a couple gets a divorce, it can be an incredibly tense and difficult situation for everyone involved. A lot of emotions are running high, and it’s easy to lose control of the situation. But when there are children involved, it’s easy to forget that they might not understand what’s going on. They might jump to their own conclusions about the why behind the what. These could, of course, be wrong and at that point, they can start blaming themselves. If you want to avoid this, you need to know how to help your children handle and understand a divorce as and when it happens.
Get The Best Lawyer
The first thing that you need to think about is hiring a lawyer who understands the situation. You need a lawyer who specialises in family law and understands how sensitive things can be. If you get a lawyer who does not see your point of view, they may not put the best interests of the child first. When you search for a lawyer, it’s crucial that you find one who does understand how a divorce can affect children. That way they will be able to help you in the difficult times ahead. No matter how bad the situation is for yourself, we guarantee you it will be a lot worse for your children. Long Okura – Attorneys at Law, specializes in divorce proceedings that involve children. You may want to contact them about representing you.
Sit Down With Your Children
Before you proceed with the divorce, it’s important that you sit down with your children. Preferably you should do this together, as a couple. You do not have to have lawyers present at this stage. Instead, you simply need to explain to your children why the two of you are getting a divorce. You must make sure that they do not think it is their fault and that they know they were not part of this decision. Depending on the age of the child, you may want to soften the blow. Older children might understand the reason for a divorce but younger children will find it difficult to comprehend. It’s suggested that you do not go into details of the divorce with children under the age of thirteen. Even if they are older, you should tread lightly. You don’t want to create any resentment from the child towards your partner.
However, you shouldn’t lie either. Make sure the children know that you still love each other. Let them know that you are still a family, even though you will be separated. If you can do this, you should find your children take the news of divorce easier.
Keep The Fighting Away From Them
When you get divorced, it can turn nasty. You might attack your partner in the courtroom. You might even try to get everything you can from them. However, for the sake of your children, there are two things you must not do. You must not use your children as an emotional weapon against your partner. You should not let your children see the two of your fighting. By avoiding this, you are keeping in mind the best interests of the child. That way, you will not experience the worst effects a divorce can have on children.
Photo Credit/Source: Flickr